I can't describe how disgusting it all is. The history of my mother to me is like a horror victim tale of MK ULTRA programming. she made sure I was poisoned and screwed over, but sent me money because her controller mother ordained it, understanding that my family relied upon abusing me whenever possible to get their own promotions out of this torture contract. I have been their sacrifice all my life. The people who died who I felt real "other side" affinity for and have felt their loss in a panging sorrow that I could not be closer to them for most of my life were my biological father and step-father---both also immersed in being slaves for bigot Nazi nasty women who controlled and possibly poisoned them to death after obtaining their property and drugging them into death and compliance.
I write this in a grudging way, sounds bitter but considering the circumstances I can't not write with a ting of remorse and anger--I realize it's better to have a calm and positive outlook. But, my entire family has cast me as an outcast (scapegoat) and of course, after ensuring I was disabled from poisoning, claiming in hissing hate at me perpetually that I am lying about my body being partially paralyzed and that there is something wrong with my back--I reassured her constantly that I would not have a medical diagnosis of a chronic scoliosis and cervical and lumbar spinal fracture, spondyloslysthesis, and resulting disability if the X-rays were not accurately portraying the extent of the violence inflicted upon me by the nighttime terror that she has fully welcomed in order to get her own promotions.
Her grandchildren are all half-non-Jewish and were lavished with love and adoration. Their parents attacked me and told their children to have nothing to do with me. My siblings have all beaten, sexually abused and threatened and attacked me every single chance they could get for most of my life.
I have to now add another reality: we were very LOVING AND POSITIVE very long ago. The hate Nazi system saw that I was very successful as a child, and that my family was loving and beautiful. They ordered that we be split up and intermarried with bigot Nazis of the 4th Reich--after using the formulas of trauma-based mind control which my family absolutely adhered to and followed implicitly in order to appease the wrath of the Nazis glaring in hate that I was brought up to be successful. The programming ever since from the expletives in Whorewood, now in the throes of unleashing the bigot hate that people are not expressly allowed to issue in hate language openly, but become ever-hostile and life-threateningly violent in the teleportation hate skits and sessions---so the endless programming to destroy my soul, spirit and body has been the ongoing aftermath of the program my family followed, without hesitation, years ago.
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When my father(s) passed, I not only had visions of my step-father with his glass eyes removed (He had eye-removal surgery on both eyes, 2 kidney transplants, and clung to life tenaciously and was inbetween a world of cognitive dissonance and having to succumb to the pressures imposed by this hate organization for fear of being killed earlier than they had anticipated in creating his destruction and isolation and control).
My father, likewise married such a nasty bigot "German" American who had me raped not only by her sons but by others while I was drugged up, asleep--made sure my father cut off my college tuition and blamed me for it, had my brother forced into bankruptcy in a mutual investment my father and he had made long before he met this woman he later married who told him, instructed him to cut off his children and fund her children for their college and law schools. My parents have always been compliant to this Nazi program, sold me into this virtual slavery and slow murder operation and have been lying and denying it all my life. But in the afterlife, I can feel the presence and support of my fathers but absolutely nothing from my mother. I can swear honestly that I feel nothing for her and feel no regret that she is dead. My love for her is buried in my life thread history and it remains as intact as it always was. I recognize that she was a product of Nazism and herself was very badly abused by her half-Nazi mother who got something like Princess treatment by the Jewish community and then terrorized and controlled her own children in order to feel like a Queen over an oppressed race.
That is the story that has been forced upon me. While I am not moved by my mother's death, I also understand and "forgive" and don't "blame" her absolutely but goddamn she went way overboard in her insanity of attacking me, and never stopped doing it. The children who claim they were by her side when she died also partook in attacking me, the wonderful "sweet" little children of the Nazis who my siblings all inter-married with. One of them has committed suicide, by the way, just to try to shatter the delusion that I am the only scapegoated outside and that the blame is not entirely on "me" because I exhibit this rage on an almost daily basis due to the sickness being forced upon me by distraught and neurotic people dissociated from Love and Life itself who are teleporting me.
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But I could have used an inheritance as she forced disability and poverty upon me and left me to be raped and abused to death. The money is going to the children of the Nazis my siblings married into and with--who abused them as well in certain cases. Left now at the mercy of the expletives who have poisoned me further nearly to death all these years--I am so extremely ill and still stuck with greying hair and sitting here in a drugged and sickened daze, wishing I had my OWN HOME and now the one source that SHOULD HAVE paid me for the years of her profiting and benefitting off torture and violence towards me (the saga is very violent, her actions were criminal towards me, literally and as an attorney she had the Nazi resources to try to truly screw me over and did not hesitate to try out her options, as I had to run away and get out of Arizona altogether just to try to save my life from her drugged up mind controlled attempts to appease the hate of the Nazis of Arizona, who lived surrounding her and who were her neighbors).
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