Sunday, March 20, 2022

There's one of the celebrities who I occasionally do a search engine thang for just becuz it's a bit fun (is it healthy?). I use this as a thermometer of sorts for my situation. But my brain, being under such ominously distorted states due to external forces, picked up this memory out of my brain-memory bank and it just came to me--a song out of the 70's I would hear from WLS out of Chicago when I lived in Champaign (got reception all those miles away on my little radio in my bedroom). I had given up at that point on classical violin and wanted to be part of the "fun" music that "everyone" was getting hip to. I now recall a movie and book (I read the book, didn't get through the movie) called Looking for Mr. Goodbar.

 "Helen Reddy--Delta Dawn Music Video". YazerPro. February 12, 2009.




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But DELTA DAWN (now realizing this title also has significant symbolism but won't go into that detail right now): the song that just popped into my brain and memory is not linked to my opinion of the male actor, the association came with all the videos on YouTube that are crazy fan stuff---obsessive/compulsive drooling for a celebrity, for example--and other ideas I won't write about in the personal domain.

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...and my 2nd association from floating but associated ties to the fan-base idolatry of celebrity brings to mind the great character of Miss Havisham from Charles Dickens' Great Expectations--again, the book brings more detail but the film versions bring the character a bit to light. Ah, what a fantastic beast Miss Havisham has created in the general but perhaps forgotten literary and film landscape. This also has personal associations with the ideas floating through my mind of this weird situation foisted upon me with being teleported to "them"--as I watch the fan stuff on YouTube, the gossip and the posturing charitable photo-op stuff of the celebrities who couldn't give a damn about the issues unless it involves some kind of profit or fame for them and their most cherished careers. But Miss Havisham and Delta Dawn are both adoring the YouTube videos (featuring every day with a fan base of millions this most famous male/one who women kneel in devotion to, some women I mean. Also men, of course).


"Great Expectations 'Miss Havisham' Mertida Hunt, 1946". Cool Guy. May 28, 2017.



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...and this song comes to mind---not because of the NAME in the title but because of the song--(I had forgotten the title of the song and the name of the woman for whom Ms. Reddy is singing) but the weird crescent moon hanging over a dying swamp is the term I might use for the technologically obsessed---I heard this song out of Chicago, over 200 miles south in Champaign and I tried to understand it with a 12-year old mind but could not grasp the sordid waste of life that Ms. Reddy was singing about---the video, though, is quite the subliminal because in the first scene of a city scene is a most clear and defined phallic symbol building--almost clearly obscene--I think media is more adept at hiding such clues at this point. But it wasn't really meant or intended to be so hidden anyway---it has a direct bearing on this theme and of the not so veiled obsession with "big city" pipe dreams and men and love and media addiction devoid of reality---(or is addiction the ultimate reality?)


"Helen Reddy--Angie Baby Cartoon". LukeDuke908. February 19, 2012.



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But as a little aside: here's to Ms. Helen Reddy and her contribution to the real feminist marches, meetings and fights that women have had to undergo all these years of protest--I AM WOMAN

hear me roar, baby! Maybe? A lady? Shady? 

"I Am Woman--Helen Reddy". Sophie Othilla Ngo. January 18, 2013.


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"Looking for Mr. Goodbar (1977) clip". Films 411. September 20, 2016.






This brings back a very different memory of me and my grandmother marching in a protest to keep abortion legal. This march was in the streets of Phoenix, Arizona around the mid-late 80's. My grandmother and I had our arms around one another while marching amongst the protesters in the middle of a long train of women marching for abortion rights to continue. Strangely this was one of the few circumstances where me and my g-ma actually embraced for more than a few seconds (she was a bit distant and very controlling--maybe a bit like a Miss Havisham but in connubial bliss with my endearing grandfather who devoted his life and everything to her, and it was mutual but I know she cheated on him and he still loved her for it. They loved one another for more than 50 years like the best of friends and devoted to their deaths). She was loving but not a doting type (my mother called her a kind of "super bitch" personality). She kind of taught me the "hard way" not to get involved with the creeple that the Nazi organization flew into my path with my brain inundated with "gravy" mind control ooze mostly all my life. She kept admonishing me to pick better men but in a whiney way which kept me on my toes--endlessly looking for Mr. Goodbar and now I've given up on looking for the elusive ultimate deadly abuser fantasy (must see but mostly must read the book Looking for Mr. Goodbar to understand my drift, can you DIG IT?).

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"5 Easy Pieces--Stand By Your Man--Tammy Wynette". HD Film Tributes. June 22, 2021.




This song, and this movie 5 Easy Pieces come to mind in this miasma of memories associated with looking up celebrity fascination on the tube circuit pumped directly into your brain and heart---themes of feminism. Oddly, the woman who played the "feminist/independent" character who Mr. Nicholson lent one of his homes to, promising her that he would never kick her out, once she reached that untenable age he did, indeed kick her out. I don't know what happened to her since I assume she got over very well--maybe I'll look it up.... But the film 5 Easy Pieces is, in part, a depiction of the fantasy good girl wifey woman who dotes on her husband and every tear waiting to drop at the slightest hat falling the cliche perfect woman-as opposed to the 70's version of the New Independent Woman who could stand on her own (maybe to buy and purchase her own house? However now that I understand the good ole Mr. Goodbar Network I know that women being blocked from obtaining financial freedom is a thing and for real, dude. At least for me becuz I'm supposedly "dangerous" and very bad and the list of hate terms for me is endless according to the people using subliminals to drain my brain of all positive reinforcement about who an what I am--thus carried-on by the teleporting terrorist mind screw operators out of H-wood, the celebrities who seem to gain money from their exploits playing the freedom loving women but support male domination oppression to an extreme degree of violence when it comes to me, as they also participate in the violence, ostensibly to prove to the male-dominated media industry controlled, I assume, by men largely and the women who support misogynist woman-hating culture.

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"Tammy Wynette--Divorce (lyrics)".  Lee Westwick. September 6, 2012.





At least d-i-v-o-r-c-e is still legal....women who want independence still have a chance to not be as enslaved but mentally they remain cloistered and supporting cheerleaders for male abusive relationships---





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Immature, dirty annd violent the obamas---the same treatment I have gotten from black nazs with white nazi filth operating directly behind them physically standing and instructing them to assault me. From grade school to the nasty dirty obamas. They truly are so immature and so bereft of any mature, legal and conscientious dignity--it's such a dirty performance. Their dehumanization of me is now at the bernie sanders, rachel maddow, hillary clinton and the rest of filthy shit whroeood level of smirking yelling bitch laughing having peop;le who have fractured and raped my body return to threaten my life for having defended myself. They teleport me while i am alsleep and I react and try not to react they observe it's a torture session for having written about the last 18 years YEARS YEARS of their murderous exploitation of me rape and torture without end they ahve profited off and been exalted for it by white nazi trash shit culture of america--liberals the worst but it doesn't matter. It is also impossible for me to type and think clearly at this point this post was half-blocked and my thoughts scattered by the brain-altering tech and interruptions of freezing the computer which rendered me in anegative mindframe, and through that negative portal they hacked extreme mood and thought manipulation and every keystroke is met by hacking so it's almost impossible to get basic simple words out all are underlined and typos everywhere--they hacked the computer froze as i began to elaborate in a clear and decisve way--I became angry the hacking into my brain and nervous system turned this into a ranting mess---you can see the deterioration plus hackes will be redacting the sentences I dids manage to write in some clear way. The obamas b rought someone who tried to kill me, had me gang raped and he is a german who is very violent. The free deals he and his german nazi rapist "punk" shithdad scum obtained (record deals, apartments) is now like free candy to exhibit nazi rape and murder threats at me laughing and black hate energy because fought back---I fought back against gang rape and I was forced to move out of the apartment of this creep who helped me to obtain health care for a loose metal rod my family organized to have me killed by paralysis and no health care provided no hostpital or doctor would help me. My family organized this, they are behind all of thisa still and like the obamas they operate with german nazis and get mansions and endless free deals, but moreso for their nazi-spawned children with their nazi non-jewish spouses or very white skinned jewish nazi spouses it's the same thing but even worse almost. It's the same structure as the obamas and their role played every goddamn election cycle as being the only answer to racism and nazi rise and fascism--which they are profiting in hundreds of millions or tmore like billions by now but like oprah it's never enough and ausing me is the portal to more and more and more. Like dolly parton laughing as the german "antifa" :"punk" singing his KGB-derived fake "underground" plitical songs back in the early 90's he obtained his record contract for his band with a real german-style symbolism of killing jewish women but deemed non-offensive in a double-speak orwellian terminology. A linguistic mid screw but all the germans undersatnd so he remains popular all the songs he sings they all know (or most of "them" who keep pushing this crap band forrward) that every "song" is a literal 180 polar opposite of intention and meaning. The obamas, I wrote but didn't copy it because my brain is so scattered my ability to focus and concentraate GONE when they hack and freeze the computer my clear thought patterns deteriorate as I grow impatient they then can hack their "demon seed" of hate into my brain. Once it envelopes my thought proceesees and nervous system I can't remove it unless I get off and wealk away out of this energy directed weapon zone.//Teleportation torture and violence once more by the obamas---they are on the nazi sayed campaign endless obama in control over the demo-rat party revival circus tour circuit and abusing me appears to be the one-and-only way they can ever fully "succeed" this is ALL THEY DO literally all they have been doing since 2008 is having me poisoned mutilated raped and tortured on non-stop murder levels as they laugh and are glorified for it by the liberal nazi establishment of the fully compromised democrat party (but absolutely endorsed by the Republicans and their Nazi affiliates now cloaked and protected under Citizen's United):The evil, uhgly immature racism of the Obamas and their endless a$$-groveling performative displays of increasing fascist propensity in front of German "men" who have raped and mutilated my body and are proud of it. They all, the entire ensemble, "represent" the "fight against fascism" all wear and don the attire of liberal institutionalized and established anti-racism anti-fascism fabrication. The fantasy has so enticed America that they can't get enough of it from "both sides". Alas the Trump deception has "hit" too many Americans openly to not willingly follow a fantastical, Wall-street advertisement selling benevolence and caring about America through Trump and his group of murdering bigots. As for the Obamas, and Elizabeth Warren and their "ilk" the list of names is very long, add Bernie Sanders and AOC to the list but nothing as rank and foul as the vicious murderous ugly sick attacks the Obamas have profited off and are now so smug about their complicity to nazi overtake of America because the established Democrat party is still claiming they never knew Trump would be so bad, they have fought against him but are just stuck. And I have been writing of the 2 years of the Obamas coming to openly attack me in the guilded age of of techno-terror fascist genocidal rape and torture in the next level of the "game" of the "Epstein Class" rape and mutilation torture and murder endowments bestowed upon all the monopolistic neanderthals of the presiding leaders "on all sides" literally the media, political "class" all the news channels all are involved and protecting this little filthy secret. The Obamas remain a pristine-performative pair of swindling conniving nazi-fed rabid parasites on me, the term "evil" is appropriate. They brought this German man who told me today it was HE who had my vertebrae smashed while sleeping, in Germany where I had lived. he had me gang raped while I was living with him in a tiny "dorf" near Boeblingen (near IBM, where he worked as well as this creep from a band using a jewish woman's zionist group based also in America to really intimate genocide against Jews but his KGB lyrics and his spiked hair have sold him off, but his first album produced when this man who the obamas brought along with the german rapist who has been screaming beating raping and attacking me and elizabeth warren has stood yelling at me next to arnold her "leader" fuhrer to provide this "too cool for you" German punk and the fashion fascist nazi bigot daughter of depp with ideas to make a movie a concept of which I wrote of and the bigot nazis of whroewood and this new german hate filth creep who has been granted access to dispensing with german nazi party money to buy into america, the endless greed of the democrats like the lying hate of the obamas fully indoctrinated into what is called the "progressive" party "abhorrence" for the "genocide" in Israel and thus rising anti-semitism and blacks claiming they are on equal footing with the genocidal discrimination that "Jews" are pouring on their darker skinned "brothers and sisters" in Palestine. It was calculated into the attack and war when Hamas assaulted the innocent people for the most part-some of them killed by hamas had actually attempted to partner with palestinians to help with their poverty plight--these are killed off because the enmity is to be encouraged not dissipated. So, the obamas brought a german who had me raped by his friends, I reacted with rage he began abusing me more openly I had to move out, I was drugged in mind control he was a party cocaine and alcoholic (deemed normal in germany they drink beer after beer all night and eveyr day as well) and he had a nervous breakdown while I was at his apartment --after he had me raped after he kicked me out and I was left after a spine surgery with no income no job and I had no way to survive but I became an english teacher. He then --he now claims, had my spine fractured and as a result I am "disabled" chronic no way to correct the injury. He was smug about it, the obamas brought him to abuse me in deep sleep because they have to prove that I wrote about them and wrote about them and wrote about them and yesterday I spent a long time writing about them as not being very much "fun" at all--and so this is their fascist "retribution" it is very much on the scale of trump's retribution at me for screaming at him 2 years ago that I wish he had been killed by that shooter in pennsylfvania--it was after a decade of him having me raped raped raped poisoned mutilated tortured raped mutilated fungus and semen put in my hair every night my hips and spine puut out of alignment making me completely crooked after my fractured body--money stolen from my room clothing destroyed--under the obamas they stole my cat had me thrown in jail after I wrote "pig" to the euro-trash men who had been poisoning me to death and raping the pioson in my body. The obamas came to presidential power by this contract out on me and their smug facsist nazi behavior is the training they are given by their partners the germans, protected by trump since they "came out" of their closeted fascist hidden disguise until trump came to power. I knew that the obamas were behind all the violence but they never appeared in teleportation to me face-to-face but that stopped just when they all knew trump was going to win--that would be 6 months prior to the actual election the vicious rape by a german scum creep (not in the group today another one) arrived. This was also kamala time running for president so they got cardi b to threaten to kill me by having me dragged beh8ind a car--and jenifer lopzen came to bellow violent hateful yelling at me and kamala came as she always has laughing at me which is what bernie sanders did the first time he arrived b ut then called me a "bitch" after I responded to more verbal abuse after physical violence. The years of their celebrity partners stealing my ideas and torturing me to obtain more means nothing to these "fighting the 1% and economic disparity injustice) for all the downtrodden with all the jokes obama makes and the repeat michelle makes of my torture-derived instruction to oprah about the Hegelian Dialectic--which was their strategy for the kamala campaign. Now they are just relying on the trauma torture they all inflicted on the american people to have a blue wave. But they are assaulting me to have nazis know that their total endorsement of abdul in michigen is warrented for their next campaign finance glut and funding for their next book tour their next heroic rescue lecture tour with jokes and jokes and the audiences watching the boob tube drooling with entertainment bliss in anticipation of a happy ending to this movie. Below is a tarot reading I asked the bot if I should write about this pair but the ingenious explanation of that bot is really very microscopic perception of the dynamics of how corruption and power are intermerged in a couple of scamming con artists---with farrrakhan as well and his role has been to divert racist hate from "blacks" to jews and nothing has fed all of them with a racist target to beat on than me--since I have never aligned with the jewish community and they are so happy to point to me as being more dark in hue than their white supremacy appearances in the spotlight --the genocide is ongoing darker skinned and hair jews are to be killed off only blonde and nazi programmed "jews" will remain in "Israel" which trump makes open statements will be a place of international riviera luxury real estate investment. Of course the godless lying evil of the obamas will get huge stakes in the development project as will bernie sanders and aoc and all the antisemites who are pushing for this war so they can invest in a new waterfront property nazi new world order playground. Next will come teleporting of anything they can suck the life out of and rape and kill if they want and mutilate and steal ideas and get away with it as the nazi enclave will resemble what they have already done to me so successfully for all these decades and still will be given full hero cheers from the gang stalking nazi programmed public. I can't go any place in America without hate death squads and no interference from a single person (on the planetj).

Hopefully the midterms, an eternity away still although technically something like "today" how many years I have been waiting for ...