Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Peering into the past, the unnamable crime committed generationally. Prosaic redundancy outside of the realm of the quotidian refuted.as poetic didacticism.

Thus, the confutatis confusion of writer's verbal spewing spouting and pimping and pampered luxurious delving into the imaginatory vectors of the spiraling sinews of Life's ironies.

Reading the onus of my malification bonus, inherited AS A CURSE FROM a Step-child I was brought up by:

"The literary imagination is a choice, a left fork off the quotidian. If the splitting were only in the mind and not the world, deep imaginative reflection would be schizophrenic. But Kafka locates the commonplace in that deep realm of the imagination. In the work of Kafka and Beckett, the barrier between the imaginative and real worlds has dissolved. K. of The Castle strives in the imaginative world while acting out his desire in the quotidian. The same in essence is true for the Unnamable. We interpret and understand his struggle as though it took place in the mind of someone in our world desperate to keep the intimations of his uniqueness from being smothered. Wordsworth's Intimations Ode provides a useful analogy: "trailing clouds of glory do we come / From God"; "Shades of the prison-house begin to close"; "And custom lie upon thee . . . / Heavy as frost." In Beckett, life extinguishes any intimations of the sacred. The self-the soul-is extinguished, and would be for the Unnamable if he were not crafty-wise and indefatigable.
We pull for him, impelled by our recognition of different aspects of the hero, and the different planes on which his representation has a powerful significance. The Unnamable, as epic hero for our times, merges into the aspect of the condemned Jew, one of the vanquished, repelled by life yet clinging to it, as if his ghostly existence constituted an act of responsibility to those already murdered. …"--



I have problems with writing due to all the hacking/drugging/mind conttrol tech continuously aimed into my brain.

The page when I post and publish appears as a jumbled mess, due to hacking. The script is tiny, the links are posted as weird nearly opaque hues. I posted the link to my step-father's review and quotes twice because I could not open the first link and thought a mistake or hacking insert had blocked the link from appearing. It did not appear when I tried to open it after publishing so I posted thelink twice without delting the first link! Ha. Both links open after a slight, but lengthy waiting time.
Reviewing articles written during that time when the ages were opening a brief moment in space and time when creativity and political awareness were merged into an explosion of imagination and inventive potentiallities for love, tenderness, kindness and awareness creativity. The articles in the Daily Illini from 1973 remind me of a time when I could talk to people and feel a deep resonance with another intelligent human being, authentic. Now there only appear what seem to be abosolutely stupid and dumb blank droids programmed with zero personality and what personality I do discover is so abominable, due to the stalking mentality, that they are not worth having any sort of emotion over. 

All I can do is read the old news and remember when there was a sparkling depth to the quality of the light, streaming into my bedroom as I lay in a bliss with the joy of a happy, loving home atmosphere, creative writers, musicians and artists converging at my house at parties where I laughed and played and people were lovely and beautiful. My Step-father, Gary Adelman, and my mother, Bette Adelman, would take long walks hand-in-hand. Kissing in the kitchen with passion and fighting to end War for all time. When the hippies could go shopping as yuppies, the black fumes of the backlash turned into a scirocco backlash lashing black death dust destruction, akin to Kali seeking revenge for too much love, too much gaiety, too much happiness for my family. Retribution in the form of a conservative backlash has in this current day, revolved into what I keep referring to as a fascist Nazi take-over of the United States.

It's not the old records, the old R&B funkadelic, the old movies, the old clothing fashion that the remnants of this movement are retained, but in the writing such as the words of the two links barely readable in the blog post (hacked, made barely visible, as the fascist Nazi hackers would stain, delete and vanish all reminders of a time when independence of thought was welcomed if it entailed keeping white males out of fighting and dying instead of black lives and whatever else dont' matter to the bigot fascist white males and their nasty female and minority minions.

Did I just have to end this brief jaunt down memory lane with the usual current event hate parallel because the hacking continues while I attempt to type this?

What a shame, a damn shame.

I must write obscurely with or without a dark lense because of the hacking and other impediments, the block to my brain from the tech, and the inability to think with this tech blasting my brain into some kind of tiny hole where I can't move beyond a few paragraphs written in jumbled blank meaning but very laden with intent and meaning, packed full of meaning but unable to organize due to the mind control program tech and drugging and etc.

Peace and Love, that movement, will always remain with me. Regardless of how much hate these empty, meaningless idiots pour into my jome, body and life, I feel lucky glad exalted compared with these disgusting blank stupid apes who attack me nightly and daily.

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I am being forced into prison or homelessness for having defended my country and my body and life. The creep goon team of whorewood and congress have been hacking endless prison and homeless videos to signal what they intend to do to me.//moved to Philadelphia from California to get away from gavin hate, which I had done last july 2025 to get away from trump florida hate lying social security fraud, only to find that since I moved to PA in late Feb, Fetterman is now being groomed by rump (and old gavin) into joining the repus with glittery incentives which is by now a familiar all-daily scene in this teleportation gig hate torment murder contract microchip hell technotyrannical death: it is not coincidence that fetterman is now a linchpin factor in switching the senate if dems get a win in nov that this one senator from the state which I just moved to, as old gavin sat with rump in teleportation a week after I moved out of florida to get away from his abuse social security hate machine (lies, manipulation trynig to empty my bank account telling me illegally to go in person to pay all in a cashier's check out of my bank account-- an illegal demand by the way. By phone they can say anything even if the call is recorded I have NO LEGAL RECOURSE. Gavin and trump are now on fetterman's cue to do the same gold-purchase contract as all the devils before him on a daily basis hateful demons rushing yelling murder at me for having watched a clip on y outube--in an effort to get the hours of death threats and yelling insults and abuse in a sick and paralyzed state from years of having been raped and poisoned on a daily basis---thusly, fetterman now being groomed by the rump regime is no mere election situation it is directly tied to me having moved there--without a doubt of course, I could never "prove" this it's very obvious to me since the contract out on me is this gigantic. ///I do not have enough money saved in my account to survive this any longer, I have been paying off subpoverty monthly substandard ssi disability benefits for years saving money every month and storing student loans and covid for an emergency. They are demanding thta I pay all back to the government and all is forgiven and permissible under law for me to retain in my bank account. That agency under the rump regime will not SEND A LETTER with exactly what I must have in my bank account before they reinstate my benefits--they discounted the covid money in one letter and now are demanding on the hacked phone calls to the main number, treating an address change like it's a "review" of my case which is not their rules probably not the law---demanding that I give exact information about dates of when they cut my money off over 14 months after it had begun while my brain is under attack; this network knows this and then when I gave one month wrong instead of february I said March (because that is when the money stopped but it was cut off in february_ thenasked me what month I had sent in a request for reinstatement I said July 2025, they remained silent then began screaming that I must go into their field office to prove my identity since I did not answer their verification questionss (by phone they only ask your dob, name address and some personal id quesions which I answer that has always been all necessary suddenly they began asking me thsese probing questions, I should have hung up but had to hang up when they began scxreaming at me "I wll tell you what is protocol" after so many lies that i told this agent on the main number that changing address by phone is protocol and it's by law mostly the only way social security demands this be done-not in person at an office). No letters upon multiple r equests and fetterman is now being seduced into the dark arts of the nazi teleportation contract which means endless money and promotions for fetterman and he is already participating in this hate crime against me. When I moved to the Phily region there had been no mention of fetterman and trump making some slide-on-over deal but suddenly it's public attention. I am unable to go into the field office for reasons that I prefer not to name but namely they will lie to me in person and try to defraud me and then claim that this was an officious meeting and then change their rules and force this completely theft upon me. All must be done by letter from that agency they are lying to me by phone and I believe this has been engineered by fetterman with the "jewish" governor's full permission. I had hoped that this jewish governor would be a bit more friendly towards me than the usual jewish nazi who fully and always goes happily along with having me destroyed for his nazi approval ratings to go up a few more notches, as is always the case. //Because I don't want my formerly incredible country The United States, which is MY country not the white nazi bigots' country not gavin old scum's state of california it's MY COUNTRY they are traitors they should be ousted from MY COUNTRY THE UNITED STATES they are selling america to nazi foreigners for some sleazy backroom sex orgy haute fantasy wealth league and all exclusion to the rest. Because I will not allow them to murder me with my consent, because I have fought to have MY LIFE not destroyed by more white nazi trash shit bigots asserting this most egregious violation of all human rights implant technology and this insidious gang stalking goon society into my life with warm smiles of subjugated traumatized stockholm syndrome love forced out of my beaten and damaged body.

*hacking and rewrites is extreme: I checked all words while writing upon having published and then returning to add thoughts which were lite...