Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Peering into the past, the unnamable crime committed generationally. Prosaic redundancy outside of the realm of the quotidian refuted.as poetic didacticism.

Thus, the confutatis confusion of writer's verbal spewing spouting and pimping and pampered luxurious delving into the imaginatory vectors of the spiraling sinews of Life's ironies.

Reading the onus of my malification bonus, inherited AS A CURSE FROM a Step-child I was brought up by:

"The literary imagination is a choice, a left fork off the quotidian. If the splitting were only in the mind and not the world, deep imaginative reflection would be schizophrenic. But Kafka locates the commonplace in that deep realm of the imagination. In the work of Kafka and Beckett, the barrier between the imaginative and real worlds has dissolved. K. of The Castle strives in the imaginative world while acting out his desire in the quotidian. The same in essence is true for the Unnamable. We interpret and understand his struggle as though it took place in the mind of someone in our world desperate to keep the intimations of his uniqueness from being smothered. Wordsworth's Intimations Ode provides a useful analogy: "trailing clouds of glory do we come / From God"; "Shades of the prison-house begin to close"; "And custom lie upon thee . . . / Heavy as frost." In Beckett, life extinguishes any intimations of the sacred. The self-the soul-is extinguished, and would be for the Unnamable if he were not crafty-wise and indefatigable.
We pull for him, impelled by our recognition of different aspects of the hero, and the different planes on which his representation has a powerful significance. The Unnamable, as epic hero for our times, merges into the aspect of the condemned Jew, one of the vanquished, repelled by life yet clinging to it, as if his ghostly existence constituted an act of responsibility to those already murdered. …"--



I have problems with writing due to all the hacking/drugging/mind conttrol tech continuously aimed into my brain.

The page when I post and publish appears as a jumbled mess, due to hacking. The script is tiny, the links are posted as weird nearly opaque hues. I posted the link to my step-father's review and quotes twice because I could not open the first link and thought a mistake or hacking insert had blocked the link from appearing. It did not appear when I tried to open it after publishing so I posted thelink twice without delting the first link! Ha. Both links open after a slight, but lengthy waiting time.
Reviewing articles written during that time when the ages were opening a brief moment in space and time when creativity and political awareness were merged into an explosion of imagination and inventive potentiallities for love, tenderness, kindness and awareness creativity. The articles in the Daily Illini from 1973 remind me of a time when I could talk to people and feel a deep resonance with another intelligent human being, authentic. Now there only appear what seem to be abosolutely stupid and dumb blank droids programmed with zero personality and what personality I do discover is so abominable, due to the stalking mentality, that they are not worth having any sort of emotion over. 

All I can do is read the old news and remember when there was a sparkling depth to the quality of the light, streaming into my bedroom as I lay in a bliss with the joy of a happy, loving home atmosphere, creative writers, musicians and artists converging at my house at parties where I laughed and played and people were lovely and beautiful. My Step-father, Gary Adelman, and my mother, Bette Adelman, would take long walks hand-in-hand. Kissing in the kitchen with passion and fighting to end War for all time. When the hippies could go shopping as yuppies, the black fumes of the backlash turned into a scirocco backlash lashing black death dust destruction, akin to Kali seeking revenge for too much love, too much gaiety, too much happiness for my family. Retribution in the form of a conservative backlash has in this current day, revolved into what I keep referring to as a fascist Nazi take-over of the United States.

It's not the old records, the old R&B funkadelic, the old movies, the old clothing fashion that the remnants of this movement are retained, but in the writing such as the words of the two links barely readable in the blog post (hacked, made barely visible, as the fascist Nazi hackers would stain, delete and vanish all reminders of a time when independence of thought was welcomed if it entailed keeping white males out of fighting and dying instead of black lives and whatever else dont' matter to the bigot fascist white males and their nasty female and minority minions.

Did I just have to end this brief jaunt down memory lane with the usual current event hate parallel because the hacking continues while I attempt to type this?

What a shame, a damn shame.

I must write obscurely with or without a dark lense because of the hacking and other impediments, the block to my brain from the tech, and the inability to think with this tech blasting my brain into some kind of tiny hole where I can't move beyond a few paragraphs written in jumbled blank meaning but very laden with intent and meaning, packed full of meaning but unable to organize due to the mind control program tech and drugging and etc.

Peace and Love, that movement, will always remain with me. Regardless of how much hate these empty, meaningless idiots pour into my jome, body and life, I feel lucky glad exalted compared with these disgusting blank stupid apes who attack me nightly and daily.

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The programming into victimization preceding genocide & Drilling into steel and cement ongoing in the room directly beneath mine, as substitute for the sleazy sick filth of noem and this german scum black-spirit filth parasite duo leeching latching lunging at me abusing me with the shit daughter of depp continuously screaming "loser" as the men yell "bitch" at me for hours and hours with questions derogatory in nature about every single thing I do--criticizing then asking me for ideas interspersed with abuse--they go off stealing the ideas to promote themselves as having any kind of different mentality than the aggregate of them all the same ugly, low, base and meaningless sick greed and rape culture bigot filth paradigm which is endlessly thrust into the ideas they steal out of me, so that the norm is never truly questioned only sold off as it's antithesis. thusly, for writing about what a trash piece of crap noem and this german filth is, terror drilling and pounding. I am so ill from detox, as I have been at extremely vulnerable levels of sickness from my body rejecting decades of poisons hardened into my spine, back, intestines, into my skull where the microchip implants created vulnerabilities of tissue integrity so the poisons seeped into these areas--the poisons are into my toes, etc. The toxicity is deadly, it feels like cancer my body is fighting extremely dangerous. For the past YEAR shit like tom hardy seeing me in this state, as well as hegseth, bannon, the shitalina pig ape pitt team of unbelievable ignorance considering the "fame" this group of posturing crap epitomize with zero integrity of intellect or empathy; truly all psychopath nazis and bigots, blacks included especially emulating that psychopathy with more flourish to present themselves almost exaggerated in their frenzy to be included. //Not just hardy who spent hours every day seeing me so ill I was shitting poisons out he yelled death threats abuse and endless hate, while exercising screaming he would break my arms, every moment was something he could use to insert some death threat (i.e. holding a knife to cut some food shouting about sticking it in my eye, etc) on and on and drugged, drugged I was and always am so I cannot tolerate it and remain "stoic" as the people who continuously DO NOTHING to stop the terrorists admonish me to remain "silent" and "good" so white male bigot can prevail without interruption (the people "advising me" via youtube videos a creep system this group uses so if I report to anybody that people are contacting me via youtube to be included in this endless money-flow contract I will appear delusional, schizophrenic, this is the intended mind screw program in all respect. The tech does allow for hacking, people can at least confirm that hacking is not a delusion. Writing about how filthy and disgusting noem is, who had gavin newsom, this german scum ugly rotten filth alcoholic scum nazi creep wearing pseudo S&M toyboy clothing (undoubtedly bisexual but probably mostly gay, as many nazis are at least in germany that has been my experience from having lived there-- but he advertises not "punk" but S&M with his apparel and his demeanor, and I do not intend this to castigate homosexuals but I am referencing his next point of detraction to being anything viable as anything but a sick filth creep fighting every day through the ignorant ugliness of kreep noem to assault me without end. He is being bolstered by the nazi filth of so many blonde and bigoted women, all immersed in euro-hate-land living or are from that continent. The americans only have their fidelity to euro-nazi-land have no respect for america or it's institutions except for the huge money machine of whorewood which congressional scum rush to participate in this contract for media coverage; the last black nazi nasty violent threatening was hakeem jeffries of course next to noem and this german scum rat-bag whore (ape piece of shit) he is so loathsome. He has been showered by the nazi women with every beauty treatment while he and noem are ordering disfiguration of my body while I collapse in utter toxic shock from the decades of poison which have literally been festering into cancer or other deadly diseases, into my body cavities. As I lay in utter sickness they force my jaws to snap shut (trying to get me to bite my tongue, this is due to the microchip implant in my throat and in my nervous system due to the network of microchip implants in my spine). They force my throat to constrict while I finally fall asleep in need of healing and peace to fight FOR MY LIFE to heal as they make my throat close off it creates a horrid snorting noise it jolts me awake; they do this repeatedly just at the moment I begin to fall asleep. This is sleep deprivation torture, it has been ongoing but also the heart palpitation torture which ended under the biden years but previously under obama and then trump 1 +2 it's now a constant---very deadly considering how worn down I am from them abusing me for 16 hours per day while I am shitting cancer poisons which I need to heal and rest from so they are murdering me still despite having had me poisoned for years (the shitalina team, the obama teams whether he was omnipresent or not but I know they have used this contract and are, like all the rest, antagonistic and snobby about their entitlement to have me raped and murdered as their righteous due as famous wealthy celebrities--all the politicians are now are celebrities with law degrees pontificating for cameras all are liars.

 \ What dirty, filthy noem has done, in partnership with gavin newsom who is beholden to nancy pelosi, absolutely in partnership with elizab...